i'm tired and feeling a little burnt out but i love life. i can't complain about working all the time because i love what i do. i can't complain about the heat because i love having my windows open and it's worth keeping the air off for. i can't think of anything that would justify complaint. i dont' believe complaint is much justified any of the time actually and i have been trying to eliminate it from my life. what i have found in doing this is that it is difficult but gets easier and easier. we get attached to our complaints. we call it venting and say it makes us feel better but really we just feel better because we have justified negative thoughts and no longer feel as bad about having them. and like a habit that is hard to get rid of it starts out difficult and slowly new habits start to take hold.

it's so challenging eliminating negative elements from our lives and i love the challenge. i'm up for it. i mess up so much every day and it's great just knowing. learning to be patient with myself and with others. learning to get a proper balance. not take anything so far that it becomes negative. learning not to take life too seriously or too lightly. learning that living life is an art. it will take a lifetime to master and i look forward to being old and grey.

the australian emailed again. i thought he wouldn't. i would wonder if he still struggles with his choice but it is not for me to wonder. i had strong thoughts of him right before i got his email and if i am accurate the way i tend to be about his sentiments when i feel them across distances, his simple email held more than it said.