i miss writing. i keep stopping, i shouldn't. i should write and write, really.

i am getting back to feeling at home in my life. management was wrong for me. it was a job and it made me feel unlike myself. i'm glad to be back to freedom.

and so with this freedom, i am finding myself comfortable again. i am more productive. i am happier. i have Trucker.. he's lovely. i couldn't see exactly how lovely at first and he just stayed near until i did. he seemed to know. he had a confidence that i belonged with him. as many times as i told him it would not work out, told him not to fall for me, he would tell me that he was not going let me push him away. i remember when he started to win me. it was summer and we were having dinner on the patio of the keg on moray and he looked at me and said, you know what you are? you're my june carter. i can almost climb back into that moment, where i tilted my head and looked at him the way you might look at someone who just made you question something you always thought you knew. i smiled and he held my gaze while the future began to take hold. he had the look of someone who knew. like he'd been to the future and just knew.